I need to be up over 2 hours before I go to work so my body can gurgle, bang, spit & realign itself for the day ahead, so I'm up at 6-6.30 each morning. On a dialysis day I have to make sure I have
a) a change of clothes for work (these need to go into work with me so go in my walker thing)
b) a change of clothes for the dialysis unit, cos I don't want to sit there for 4 hours in my work trousers/shirt (these must also come into work with me so also go in my walker thing)
c) a change of clothes in case anything goes awry whilst on the dialysis machine as I can't get to a loo/move at all sometimes (these don't need to come into work with me but do need to be in the car and then I have to remember to swap bags over when I get to the dialysis unit)
d) remember to charge my phone & i-pad so I have something to do (other than reading) while on the machine
e) remember the emla cream/spreader/cling film to wrap my arm in once the cream is applied - I look like an oven ready chicken
f) remember to take my card to get into the underground car park at the unit & have it somewhere handy once I pull up at the barrier.
Honestly its a nightmare, but it does appeal to my organised side!
So.... Thursday of this week arrived. I went to work in the morning, got lots done & enjoyed being there. At 1.30 I snuck off to the loo to baste my arm in emla cream & wrapped it in clingfilm (there is now a roll of it living in my desk drawer), I got a few odd looks off some of the prosthetists!!
At 2, I quickly got changed in the loo (again) and left to drive to Altrincham, eating a butty as I went.
At the unit Lorraine & Gill were the nurses today and I waited while they helped another patient with her needles. After about half an hour it was my turn, obs were done (BP was a bit low) and needling procedure began. My arm was cleaned of all the emla cream and after a bit of feeling around for the right spot, an injection of lignocaine was given - Lorraine was on hand holding duties again. That first needle didn't work - here we go again.....
The second needle worked - huzzah! The third needle was a bit tricky and it was in at an angle and took a bit of wiggling. The wiggling is the stuff that sends my squeam-o-meter racing and it was now as I could feel the needle wiggling about under my skin - eeeurrrghhhhh *shudder*
But, they were in so the machine was started up and away we went. During the next 30 minutes the machine alarm went off 3 times, there was lots of needle wiggling, lots of pulling off of tape & repositioning needles and then the cry of "Oh it's blown!" My fucking fistula, the fistula that everyone says is marvellous and is going to be so good when its matured, had thrown an utter wobbler & blown. Oh great.... more bruising.
During the next ten minutes of them faffing trying to get the blood in the machine back into me through the only working needle, I had a tight tournequet on my arm & a needle in the blown fistula which was hurting like almightly buggery. Have you seen Airplane? Where the flight attendant is singing/playing guitar and she knocks the drip out of the sick girls arm? That was me... doing a fish impression with my lips sucking in trying to pretend it was hurting!!! It was finally loosened and I breathed out, almost blowing the woman in the bed opposite across the ward.
So after all that I was sent home with an even more bruised arm which was now swollen too and told to go to CAPD in the morning for a blood test at 8am to see how urgent dialysis was.
So.... Friday morning I was a CAPD at 7.45, before the department opened as they were still having handover. I waited, and waited... was shown to a bed, and waited, and waited, and waited (there's not another patient in the department while I'm sat twiddling my thumbs). At 8.45am they finally took some blood. I was 45 minutes late getting to work - aararrggghhhhhhh!!
Diane from the Altrincham unit rang a couple of hours later to say that my results were good. My function was at 11% = eh? how did that happen.....! and my potassium level was ok so she said she was happy for me to have a break and go for dialysis next Wednesday. Woohooo - 5 whole days off.... **happy dance**
